Random thoughts: Monday

It’s another Monday morning! Here are my random thoughts:

• I actually thanked God this morning for a wonderful Monday that I was not lazy to go to work.
• Another bad news of robbery and killing in UP Los Banos. Gosh, I think government officials need to be doused by a metal hose to wake up and improve security! This is scary people!
• Nowadays, Wendy is eager to go to school now that she knows there is around just 2 more weeks to go before the vacation…and the mother is envious.
• I want to pray more this Lent.
• I want a vacation. [What else is new?]

Let’s all have a great week!

A growing family

Two weeks ago, my sister gave birth to her and her husband’s second child, another daughter, Alexis Franchesca. The past week, we’ve been busy with babysitting Yshy and helping my sister out with the new baby.

Babies are always a great blessing (it’s a great time to celebrate with wine and shari’s berries). In my case, even though I had Wendy at a young age, I never thought of the situation as unfortunate but rather a big blessing. As a friend told me: “The baby [Wendy] might be the biggest hurdle you’ll encounter in your life, but it is the greatest blessing God has given you.” And she was right.

Anyway, now that another baby has joined our family, we are squealing again with happiness. It will be another round of cleaning lungads and poo-poos, watching out for “firsts,” shouting with the first coos and words, teaching how to crawl and walk, and watching another baby grow. I can’t wait!

Babies are such a joy ano?

Dreams

Last night, I had a vivid dream about my mother.

I dreamt she just came home from a trip to Singapore, by herself, and was glowing with happiness upon her return. In my dream, she already had cancer and had just months to live (I think that’s why she went on the trip in the first place). But despite the disease ravaging her body, she had an aura of a healthy person. She seemed so at peace. She recounted to us her adventures in Singapore, what she did, what she saw, what she ate, what she experienced, whom she met. She even gave us her children her remaining dollars (whooo! time to buy that kaufmann fabric if this dream were real!)!

I have no experience in interpreting dreams, nor do I even try. But I’d like to think that this one is telling me that my mother is peace wherever she is. I’ve been missing her a lot these weeks, and this dream is such a “relief.” Her face in my dream was so happy, and this made me happy too.

Thank God for this dream.

Fast and abstain

I can’t believe it’s Lent once again!

Wendy asked me last week whether she was required to fast and abstain from meat since she already had her first communion. I honestly did not know. Haha! Well, as far as I can remember, the minimum age was 12. So as per my standard,  she was still off the hook.

Nevertheless, I explained to her that meat wasn’t the only thing we can abstain from. For me, the essence of this whole abstaining idea is to lessen/avoid things that you love the most, not necessarily meat. I mean, how about vegetarians? They don’t eat meat right? So it can be anything you are addicted to: Internet (eg, Facebook), shopping, macanudo cigars, watching movies…there are a lot we can choose from. I know of someone who is addicted to chocolate who abstains the whole Lenten season. How’s that for abstaining?

Bottom line: sacrifice.

Let’s all have a meaningful Lenten season. 

Sliding doors

I originally wrote this post on Saturday, February 18.

*****

Yesterday, I should have been on a plane, going somewhere I’ve never been before. For reasons too many and a story too long to recount here, the trip did not push through.

Last night, as I was outside, I saw a plane hovering in the sky. We live near the airport, so this should have been a normal sight. Expect that at that time last night, as I saw the airplane in the sky, I thought to myself, I should have been riding an airplane earlier today. I should have been in xxxx right now.

I remember a friend asking me before, “Grace, ano sa tingin mo ginagawa mo ngayon kung wala kang anak?” [Yes, I became a mom at an early age.] My answer? I think I could be traveling more and I could be trying work overseas, just to see how it feels.

This was a vague answer, for it doesn’t really entail life-changing moments. I mean, I was left to wonder, ano nga kaya ang buhay ko ngayon kung hindi ako nagka-anak?

And I was left to imagine what life would be like for me. In short, just like I thought I should’ve been in xxxx when I was standing in front of our house last night, I know that I would be in a different situation had I not been a mother at a young age. I may not know the specifics, as in what I would have been doing, what my status in life would have been, or where in the world I would be, but I’m sure it would be different and I would be “somewhere” different.

And yes, this happens to all of us. There are and will be moments when we imagine a different life, a different situation than what we have right now. Others can be as light as what I experienced, that I should have been frolicking in a beach right now (and perhaps buying pajamas for girlfriend as pasalubong), whereas others are heavier, like I could have been dead right now.

Remember the movie Sliding Doors? That’s what I mean.

As for me, I still wish I were in xxxx today.

Legacy

I am not a singer. I am not a musician (hell I can’t even play godin acoustic guitars). But that doesn’t mean I do not like songs and music. I do.

This is why it was disheartening, although not really shocking, for me to hear of Whitney Houston’s death. I wasn’t really a fan. But I did like some of her songs, such as When You Believe, Where Do Broken Hearts Go, and of course, I Will Always Love you.

We all try to make sense of this thing called life. And I know we all hope that as we pass on to the next life, we leave something behind that we can say is our legacy.

Music was Whitney Houston’s. And great it was.

Hope she is now singing with the angels.

Do not sweat the small stuff

Yesterday, Wendy had a party lined up at her classmate’s house. When she got home from school though, she told me she wouldn’t be going. Not that she did not want to but because she failed a Hekasi quiz and thought she did not deserve to go to the party. She told me that it was her sort of punishment. I think she actually thought that I would tell her to put all her clothes in leather briefcases and go! Ha ha! For a quiz?

In the end, I told her to get dressed and took her to the party, where, she told me after, she had soooo much fun.

If there’s one thing I learned in the past when it comes to relationships, any relationship, it is “do not sweat the small stuff.”

So Wendy, for failing a quiz, your mama is still totally ok with that!

Wedding fun

My youngest sister got married over the weekend. Needless to say, the days before and after were so jam-packed!  We went from stapling missalettes to going off to buy silver coins! Up to now, we are still feeling the hangover…with a couple of postwedding dinners and small gatherings, not to mention the stuff we have to fix after.

It was a beautiful wedding. Although, understandably, tears flowed [tears of joy of course], laughter was the theme of the wedding. And same with my other sister’s wedding, love was all around. We had so much fun: the ceremony was touching, food was delicious, speeches were short [halleluiah!], the games were fun! It was a memorable wedding indeed!

I thank God my sister found a loving man. And I pray a long and happy marriage for the both of them! I’m now waiting for a little Agnes or Jeo! Haha!

Random thoughts: Thursday

I sort of love Thursday. Why? Because the next day is Friday! Whopee!

Here are my random thoughts today:

• I was sad to hear that Heidi Klum and Seal are separating.
• My sister’s wedding is nearing…and I’m anticipating mayhem. Last night, we were busy putting together giveaways.
• Wendy’s baking and cooking skills are getting better. I’m scared of putting on the pounds!
  
• I watched a show on baking last night and was awed by the creations. One example was a cake with a magnet so that the topper would float. Amazing! What will they think of putting next? A kick plate? A diamond necklace? Whoo!
• When I think of my mother, I always wonder what it feels like to die. Morbid!

Enjoy the rest of the week!

The gift of music

One of the things my mother has imparted on us her kids has been the love of music…not just singing, which she was good at, but also with playing. In fact, my sisters took piano, flute, and violin lessons to appease my mother. I can remember those times when my mother would request my sister to play for her,as she genlty waved her hand with the beats. As for me, I did learn to play the piano, although not upto the level that my sister did.

When my mother died, almost so did the piano, the flute, the guitar, and the violin.

A few weeks ago, my nephew was looking for his Lola’s guitar. He wanted to learn. I got the guitar, still with its guitar straps and the strings intact. I told my nephew to learn, to really learn.

Sometimes, I would hear the familiar strums of guitar that I once heard when my mother was playing. Although my nephew still has a lot to learn, I know my mother is in heaven, singing and dancing with his strumming.